MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL AND HOPE THE NEW YEAR 2012 IS A FABULOUS ONE !
Chrismas was very quiet just the 4 of us Viki Liam Will and myself - later Danny (viks boyfriend) came round but after many years of never less than 10 and up to 25 people for dinner and tea, clearly only 4 was bit of a shock to our system :/
Myself and Will got up and our usual present opening didnt happen as we were the only ones there - guess things are gonna be this way from now on and time to get used to it!
I walked the dogs early in the morning with my sister Georgina, we went and took flowers to mum and dads grave - saw my brother Gerald and had a quick chat then home and dinner prep began. So a very very unusual and quiet Christmas the begining on our new life i guess.
Well - so here we go again - im waiting for 2011 to end - its been yet another crappy year and although i dont want to wish my life away i will be glad to see the back end of it!
I keep hoping things will get better and this year has been so bad (again!) im wishing and hoping 2012 will improve only to be tols 2012 is the end of the world - WELL AINT THAT JUST MY LUCK ! (or same constant bad luck) but putting the end of the world aside my world for 2012 is gonna be better im NOT having another crappy year!!! NO WAY!
Last year started with a funeral as have the past 6 years, it went on with a lot of problems for my daughter, a lot of illness for me, worry about my son as he had become stagnant in his life, worry about my husband over working, and then of course my Mum i could see her decline very slow as it was, she was sad and unwell and tired, i wasnt able to be with her as much as i wanted as i was constantly unwell myself and didnt dare pass any thing on to her. We lost her in August :'( - through out 2011 we lost 12 family and very close friends its been a hard miserable year, among being ill myself i was still battling menopause and depression but fortunately for me despite everything im still clinging on to the edge of that deep dark pit i crawled out of - the fight is now on to get right out of it and walk away.
There have been some good bits but for other people and ive been glad to be part of their life and know there is still some good things happening out there. It gives me hope...
Personally, for me i cant think of any thing good particularly happening, its a daily fight for me. I am thankful for what i do have and for my family all i want is my children to be safe happy and live with ease and for us to have the stresses we have endured to ease up and give us a break! - Finances have been ok ish (bit on and off) as i worked for some time and helped hubby out taking some pressure off him and also having a bit extra cash i could see my daughter and grandson were ok after their problems hit, it cut down on my worries knowing pressure was off of them. Working was a great struggle but i met some special people - i just wish i had been well and with less problems intrupting my working day.
My son flew off to mexico - emotional in the sense that of course i didnt want him so far away and it upset me he had gone but happy for him to finally start having a life again - he needed to move on things had been tough for him since his accident, hes now with a very nice girl and seems very happy. He stays in touch and i got to speak to him christmas day.
This is the first year i have NOT had the flu or even an horrific cold, upset stomach or some other problem (have over done things and my back has flared up but i know some rest will get it right some time soon ) Im tired - errr i mean exhausted it will be good this week to sit back and rest im also indulging in the festive foods because as of 2012 the DIET begins OH YES ! big time ... watch this space lol
So where from here - im hoping no more funerals PLEASE ! in 6 years we have lost a huge 60+ people ive been constantly dragging myself to funerals so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE no more we have had more than our fair share of loss and sadness and grieving !
The DIET begins for 2012 i so need to lose this weight and get fit , fitness is my main objective and to get fit i also need to lose this weight so as of the 1st i will be on it (and so will hubby lmao! )
This is the last year i want to be working and paying out on the house - come on lets finish it! - its dragged on as our time has been taken with the above ^ trials this life has thrown at us but we truely need to finish the house and move on to relax in life a few holidays and sit back - we are rapidly aging and feeling it so this year is the year of completion !
My art exhibit is in February so i have 6 paintings to sort our rapidly :/
So a few goals i want to acheive for 2012 all taking time money and lots of effort (specially that diet :S) lol
BUT HERE IS WISHING YOU ALL A GOOD ONE FOR 2012 - TRUELY TIME FOR THINGS TO GET BETTER AFTER ALL FROM HERE THE ONLY WAY IS UP !
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